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Complaining When You're Commenting

REAL ISSUE: ‘I’m just making casual conversation!’

‘nor complain, as some of them also complained, and were destroyed by the destroyer.’ I Corinthians 10:10


Do you realize how often people complain in casual conversation? Remember, complaining means to protest, whine, find fault, nitpick, nag, object, and criticize. But you can be engaging in small talk and someone will comment about how hot it is. Ask someone how they’re doing and you’ll get a litany of ailments. Compliment someone and they’ll tell you how inexpensive the item you just complimented really is. Let’s not even bring up President Obama and the economy. The common denominator in each example – complaining. You may not have intentionally set out to complain, but by your casual conversation you ended up there.

Or let’s use another example of commenting when you’re actually complaining. Say for instance a man is unattractive. The object of his affection commented to her friends he was so ugly that he looked like a backyard frog. What she said – was it a complaint or a comment? If you answered both, you’re correct. We learned in our last issue that another definition of complaining means to curse and when you curse you are saying something bad about someone. So you see her comment while having a casual conversation with her friends was actually a complaint.

Others complain or speak bad about people or situations because they feel that by doing so they’re telling it like it is. True, but that doesn’t make it right or that you were suppose to tell anything at all. God once told me to keep my penetrating observations to myself. Remember when our parents told us that ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all’ – that’s sound advice.

Once again, 1 Corinthians 10:10 says, ‘…some of them complained and were destroyed by the destroyer.’ Remember, destroy means to lose. So let me ask you a question. If you knew that every comment, fly remark, or witty repertoire you took part in would result in you actually losing something, would you say it? Yeah, you might but know your verbal assaults will cost you something.


Listen to yourself, I mean really listen. Pay attention to how much of your day is spent casually commenting. Ask yourself, ‘will these conversations cause me to lose something?’ If so, ask God to forgive you and ask Him for grace for your casual conversations.


Enlist your relatives, friends, and co-workers. Take up a collection every time one of you complains. The person with the fewest occurrences wins!


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