Speak To That Man

I watched as my son’s countenance began to change. He wasn’t as outgoing or confident as he usually was and then he finally asked, “Why don’t y’all women speak? I mean, I’m just speaking!” I thought about it for a minute and wondered why I didn’t. So I told him, “It’s the way a man speaks. If he’s speaking like he’s flirting, then I don’t respond. But if he’s sincere, I’ll speak.” I watched as the days went by, he became increasing despondent. I prayed and asked God what I could do. He then revealed how I'd contributed to the problem.I thought, “What? ME!?! What’d I do?”

He showed me that each time a man smiled at me and I looked away, complimented me and I didn’t respond, or spoke to me and I refused to acknowledge his presence – that I had just sown a seed of rejection into that man and was reaping the harvest of it in my son. Ouch! “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.” (Galatians 6:7) As He continued to whoop me, I soon saw that it’s not my place to demand that a man speak to me in a certain way. As a child of God, Jesus commanded in Matthew 5:47, ‘… if you greet the brethren only, what do you more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so?’ So for several years, I've forced myself to greet the brothers; even when they hadn’t met my verbal standard. I’m not advocating that you respond to every cat call, whistle, horn, question, or greeting. But I had to start by simply acknowledging their presence which meant I actually had to look in their direction when they spoke. I soon graduated to a slight grin or wave. One day I’d nod, which eventually led to me speak. And believe it or not, I can now hold a brief, and I do mean brief, ‘you-ain’t-gotta-chance-to-holla-at-ya-girl-kinda conversation.

Women of God, I encourage you to start where you are. Smile, nod, grin, way, like his status, or chunk up a deuce; but do something to acknowledge that man. Why? Because he is a man. As women, we've got to do a better job about making sure we acknowledge the men in our lives