So my BMF and I were having a conversation this morning about Will, Jada and August. In case you don’t know, actress and NAACP Image Award recipient, Jada Pinkett Smith, allegedly had an affair with 27-year-old hip hop artist August Alsina with the permission of her Grammy and Academy Award winning husband, Will Smith. Before we get into it, let me preface this by saying, this is in no way an attempt to capitalize off of another person’s mistake. The reason I’m writing about it now is because this is a REAL ISSUE that needs to be addressed – from followers of Jesus Christ, so that the church and the world understands there is biblical precedence for something similar to their alleged affair in the Bible.
“Let's ask the hard question: Is Cougarin' in the Word?”
Again, it was during that conversation that I commented on August’s maturity, to which my friend rejected. He stated that from a man’s perspective, his actions were just the opposite. In my defense, I said that I based my maturity assessment based upon what was said during his interview with radio personality, Angela Yee, in that his explanations, positions, and spiritual experiences weren’t that of your normal 27-year-old. To my point, I also added that his maturity was a staunch reflection of Jada’s immaturity. I know because before I gave my life to Christ, I primarily dated nothing but men who were twice my age. Looking back, I now realize that those older men weren't only drawn to my looks but because they themselves were immature. And though she’s considered, and probably is a very wise and intelligent woman, August merely mirrored those parts of her that have yet to develop.
As such, their alleged affair has sparked a public debate as to whether Mr. Smith gave August permission to be with Mrs. Smith. There is also some conversation around the fact that August is almost half Jada’s age. And though if the role was reversed, and it was Will’s side chick bringing an allegation, I’m pretty sure age wouldn’t be an issue but because cougaring is something that we seldom see, their indiscretion has taken on another light. But in that light is something that can seen in 1 Corinthians 5.
Cougaring in the Scripture
In 1 Corinthians 5, we find Paul rebuking a couple in the faith community, that were having a much-publicized affair. Verse 1 reads, “It is…reported that there is sexual immorality among you…that a man has his father’s wife!” From that verse, we find a stepson having an affair with his father’s wife. Therefore, it’s safe to assume that the stepmother is much older than her stepson. Therefore, for all intents and purposes, she too would be a cougar; a woman who has a sexual relationship with a younger man. And though Jada was not August’s stepmother, I use this only to prove that the Bible does speak about cougar-ish relationships.
So what happened to this couple? Well, Paul said that such ‘a one’ should be ‘…delivered…to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.’ When you read that, ordinarily you'd think that Paul was directing that verse to both the stepson and stepmother. However, he was not. Paul spoke specifically to the man. Hence his use of the words ‘such a one’ and ‘his’. Paul recommended that he be expelled from the faith community so that he could later be saved. But why didn’t he pronounce such judgment upon the woman? Because she was married. Her punishment would have come in the form of receiving a certificate of divorce from her husband because of her affair.
“Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery…’ (Matthew 5:31,32)
Am I saying that Will should divorce Jada? No, I am not. In my opinion, I believe that Will, Jada, August, me, and you, my dear reader, should do as Jesus instructed in John 8 when, ‘…the scribes and Pharisees brought…Him a woman caught in adultery. And when they had set her in the midst, they said to Him, “Teacher, this woman was caught in adultery…Now Moses, in the law, commanded us that such should be stoned. But what do You say?”….’ Jesus told them, “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.” I don’t know about you, but I am not without sin. Therefore, what happens to their marriage, or to August for that matter, I am not in a position to judge because Jesus also said,
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge,
you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you.” Matthew 7:1,2
As a single woman and because I am not without sin, I do not want to put my mouth on Jada, Will, or August because I don’t want to be faced with that same scenario in my future marriage. If you’re married, single, or divorced, prayerfully you would want to do the same. Because remember: The stepson, who Paul recommended be delivered to Satan, did later repent. Much like what August has done. After which, Paul pleaded with the same faith community that they forgive and accept him back (2 Cor. 2:1-8). Prayerfully, those of us in the church will be as forgiving. And let us not forget what Jesus told the adulterous wife, “Neither do I condemn you.” Therefore, let us also not condemn Jada because if its two things we all need from the Lord, it’s mercy and forgiveness.
Pray this with me: Heavenly Father, please forgive me for what I've said about Will, Jada, and August. I am not in a position to judge because I know what I’ve done, and the same mercy and forgiveness I ask of You, I ask that You’d extend that same mercy and forgiveness to them. In Jesus’ name.
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